Spanking

[Common-Tater]

Question: If both biological parents are present and active in a child's life is it appropriate for a step-parent to spank?

I am not asking if spanking is appropriate. This is a question for parents. If you have no children, you can't possibly understand the question.

[HoosierHelen]

Question: If both biological parents are present and active in a child's life is it appropriate for a step-parent to spank?

I am not asking if spanking is appropriate. This is a question for parents. If you have no children, you can't possibly understand the question.

I am absolutely NOT comfortable with a step parent spanking a child.

[Graygleam]

I agree, a step-parent should NEVER spank a child.

[No Adventure Is Too Small]

Question: If both biological parents are present and active in a child's life is it appropriate for a step-parent to spank?

I am not asking if spanking is appropriate. This is a question for parents. If you have no children, you can't possibly understand the question.

Formerly having used spanking as a punishment, I now have to say.
Spanking is not appropriate for anyone, I now realize the only thing
that spanking teaches is that if you feel you are in the right Abuse of someone else is ok.
I was even spanked once in 5th grade by a principal and all that I remember from
it is pure hatred for the fact that he felt it appropriate to strike me. That was over 40 years ago
and I still despise that man. So maybe before anyone strikes out they should stop and consider
the long term implications of their actions.

[LuciusBeebe]

I am not asking if spanking is appropriate.

Yeah, you basically are.

[Common-Tater]

I am absolutely NOT comfortable with a step parent spanking a child.

I agree, a step-parent should NEVER spank a child.

Was just curious if I was out of line by being upset that my ex-wife and her husband think it is appropriate for him to spank my son. My son also says they use a belt.

[LuciusBeebe]

Was just curious if I was out of line by being upset that my ex-wife and her husband think it is appropriate for him to spank my son. My son also says they use a belt.

Ask a cop.

[No Adventure Is Too Small]

Was just curious if I was out of line by being upset that my ex-wife and her husband think it is appropriate for him to spank my son. My son also says they use a belt.

Find a way to put a stop to it before it goes any further you rarely get do overs to protect your child.
A child is the most precious gift that we are ever entrusted to care for in our lives.
That privilege should never be taken lightly.

[Graygleam]

Was just curious if I was out of line by being upset that my ex-wife and her husband think it is appropriate for him to spank my son. My son also says they use a belt.

People that use belts on children may wind-up explaining it to Child Protective Services. If your son is telling the truth, they could be in big trouble, IF it is leaving marks. Also, if there are marks or bruises, or welts, you are, by law, required to report it.

[Common-Tater]

People that use belts on children may wind-up explaining it to Child Protective Services. If your son is telling the truth, they could be in big trouble, IF it is leaving marks. Also, if there are marks or bruises, or welts, you are, by law, required to report it.

The problem is there are no marks. It's his word against theirs. And they are denying it. If I push it without evidence, I'm the one the law will go after.

[No Adventure Is Too Small]

The problem is there are no marks. It's his word against theirs. And they are denying it. If I push it without evidence, I'm the one the law will go after.

Wouldn't be you pushing it if the child is the one that talks to C.P.S.
Let C.P.S. determine the evidence, never be afraid of protecting your child.
His safety is your only concern.

[HoosierHelen]

Wouldn't be you pushing it if the child is the one that talks to C.P.S.
Let C.P.S. determine the evidence, never be afraid of protecting your child.
His safety is your only concern.

I have got to agree with you. Let the child speak to the CPS and tell his own story. I cannot understand how bringing this issue before the court could possibly cause harm to Tater? Concern for the well being of our children must be the priority of our courts and of our society. My sincere best wishes for Tater and his son!

[Common-Tater]

Wouldn't be you pushing it if the child is the one that talks to C.P.S.
Let C.P.S. determine the evidence, never be afraid of protecting your child.
His safety is your only concern.

He's 4. I've already been told by my attorney that without physical evidence they will not persue the case. There's no proof. And unfortunately the word of a 4 year old is meaningless.

[No Adventure Is Too Small]

He's 4. I've already been told by my attorney that without physical evidence they will not persue the case. There's no proof. And unfortunately the word of a 4 year old is meaningless.

That is not totally true, while I understand that your attorney may say that to your question.
A call to child protective services will still initiate an investigation by them.
They will at least talk to your son and form their own conclusion after investigating.
Way back when I was even younger than you currently are I had gone through a
divorce and at one point in time my ex called CPS on me saying that I was not providing
proper care for my child. They investigated immediately from just a call being made to them.
I was cleared of any improper care, but they do take complaints seriously. Probably even
more so now, as my incident was over 30 years ago.

[TheBigB]

He's 4. I've already been told by my attorney that without physical evidence they will not persue the case. There's no proof. And unfortunately the word of a 4 year old is meaningless.

This may sound a lot less serious than it is meant to be, but you've indicated you are in some form of the security business - any chance of getting a bug on your son?

[Common-Tater]

This may sound a lot less serious than it is meant to be, but you've indicated you are in some form of the security business - any chance of getting a bug on your son?

That creates a whole new set of legal issues. Not to mention how I would get something like that on his person, knowing that she'll change his clothes at some point and I usually don't get them back.

[Common-Tater]

That is not totally true, while I understand that your attorney may say that to your question.
A call to child protective services will still initiate an investigation by them.
They will at least talk to your son and form their own conclusion after investigating.
Way back when I was even younger than you currently are I had gone through a
divorce and at one point in time my ex called CPS on me saying that I was not providing
proper care for my child. They investigated immediately from just a call being made to them.
I was cleared of any improper care, but they do take complaints seriously. Probably even
more so now, as my incident was over 30 years ago.

I don't get much cooperation from CPS because I got one of their case workers in trouble for sharing information about a case with an inappropriate party and making up information that was not supported by the facts. From my experience, I've found them to be biased, harsh when they don't like someone, and more interested in punishing parents than reconciling families.

[jackzayum]

I'm not yet a mother although I have children which I took care of. They are my two little cousin's ages 6 and 4. Their mom just left them on my mothers care, since both their parents left for a work abroad and I assist my mom too. Even though they are hyper active I keep on understanding since they are little kids. I do
disagree on spanking children.